Rare Sightings, Or Not
I am here. I am alive, and well. Celebrated my 49th birthday with my loved ones this past Sunday, and as I am with each birthday, blessed and honored, that God has given me another year to share with friends, and family.
So many changes have been occurring, with even more on the way. It is simultaneously scary, and exhilarating to wake up wondering what will be tossed to me that day.
I had lunch today with a friend who held a state elected office, and he asked me what my deal was. Where was I heading? What were my goals? Am I really going to ride off into the sunset, and be satisfied with leaving political opinion behind? I was paid many compliments, while being called out on my inability to follow through on anything. It’s my thing. It’s what I do. Not because I don’t have it in me, but because there are other priorities outside my own desires, and passions. Those priorities have always been a part of my reality, I’ve respected their places, and the wealth (literally, and figuratively) that they’ve brought into my world.
But somewhere along the line . . .
Somewhere along the line, I also fell into playing political games. I was more than happy to forward the latest rumor about So-And-So, because, by gawd, their principles were wrong!!! They were an adversary. Surely, SURELY, this smut about them must be true, because, LOOK AT THEM!!
I have been a victim of rumors, and lies. What goes around, comes around; and unfortunately, part of the deal of playing politics. But . . . does it have to be?
I told my friend I have a hard time staying in the game, staying focused, in part (outside of my priorities) because I get too emotionally involved. I’m human. I simply can’t help it. I’d like to think that I have the ability to remain intellectual, and/or analytical on any given narrative, but I fail. Repeatedly. I’d like to think that my words can make a difference. That I actually can try and make the world a better place for my kids. But I just haven’t seen the fruits of that labor.
I’ve spent at least two years in both a spiritual, and existential crisis. Trying to mesh politics into that seems, just, dirty. There are truths in this universe of ours. Truths are relative, but they are true to the individual committed to their flavor of it. I try and remind myself that anyone’s strongly held belief, is as relevant as my own; whether I agree with them or not. This is an admirable, and necessary character every single one of us should have, or ponder to attain; and so very hard to remember when you see blatant dishonesty, and straight up stupidity.
The wasted hours, energy, and effort I’ve squandered . . . The wasted hours, energy, and effort I’ve watched others squander . . . for what? Honestly, the foundations of this country are quite simple. It’s the political game that made them complex. That complexity feeds the beast of the duopoly. You can’t change the trajectory when you refuse to quit feeding the beast. You can’t change the trajectory when you continue to refrain from challenging your own precepts, and accept that maybe, just maybe, you could be wrong.
It’s okay to be wrong. It’s the not admitting it, or not altering your behavior in that wrongness that is wrong. If we don’t challenge ourselves, if we set aside intellectual honesty because it is in opposition to our goal, our narrative; then we are no better than a non-sentient being.
I try and remind myself daily that Christ commands us to pray for those who persecute us. Easy to ponder, hard to implement. But, in this journey, and this sharp turn I’ve taken; I hope it becomes commonplace.
Thanks for the chat, Scott.